Teacher: I see you missed the first day of school.
Kid: Yes, but I didn't miss it much.
Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention?
Student: I'm paying as little attention as I can.
Teacher: James, where is your homework?
James: I ate it.
Teacher: Why?
James: You said it was a piece of cake!
Teacher: Why is your homework in your father’s handwriting?
Pupil: I used his pen!
Teacher: You’ve got your shoes on the wrong feet.
Pupil: But these are the only feet I’ve got!
Today my teacher yelled at me for something I didn’t do.
What was that?
My homework!
What is white when it’s dirty and black when it’s clean?
A blackboard!
Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with "t".
Pupil: Today and Tomorrow.
A man and his clever son:-
My wife left the car unattended for only a minute, but it was long enough for our two year old son to climb in, throw the car into reverse and crash into a lamppost. He was fine but the car wasn’t, and I had a hard time explaining who was behind the wheel of the insurance company. After a slight pause, the adjuster asked, “Do you let him drive often?
A man telling a funny thing his friend tom did:-
Tom a friend of mine was recently on holiday with his family in the Swiss Alps. One day he went for a walk through a deep valley. He decided to test its reputation for amazing echoes. “HELLO”! He shouted out and, sure enough back came the reply, “HELLO”! “HELLO”! ”HELLO”! Very much amused by this, he shouted out “TOM”! Much to his surprise back came another reply. “YES”?”
Quotable quotes
It takes a great deal of bravery to stand
up to our enemies but as much to stand up
to our friends.
JK. Rowling
Take the shot even if your knees are shaking.
Robin
Imagination is the highest kite one can fly.
Kyle Farnsworth
Trust changes people. they become
what you tell them to expect.
Scott Adams
